Apologises

Ladies, i apologise for my lack of contact for the last couple of months.. A lot has happened in the world of Yuppie . From an abundance of men, to love back to men and wild parties and even fun on far eastern retreats.

Of course it served a purpose, but it gave me more ammunition to talk about the things we love most . Sex, fashion, money and men. I have a little something for you to keep you salivating until my next installment.

Meet Dahlia who who needs a man when you have these luscious leather shorts to keep all the boys eyes ogling . Think dominatrix meets seventies disco and voila...

Bye for now

Yuppie xxx

Full yes, but never satisfied....

Picture the scene, for starters  i will have mint pea soup drizzled with double cream  followed by a rack of Chatsworth lamb with lemon crust finished with an all American baked vanilla cheesecake accompanied with  raspberry coulis with lashings of cream at you convenience. However, after you lavish in your ample servings something niggles in the back of your mind. Yes. this was pleasant, but i still want more!

This feeling seems to arise in different circumstance. It is a feeling that plagues me regularly. During work, in the gym, out on a date, also in a relationship.

We have all been there, the heavy petting, the pulling of the hair. Heavy breathing and panting, that electric feeling starting to bubble and expand from below. His thrusting actions feeling as if they are touching every part of your body, making you sweat and heightening your senses. You start to loose focus, your caught up in the moment you feel overwhelmed and want to release. Then he releases, without a thought on timing, kisses you on the cheek and rolls over. The moments passed, and your still hungry. You try to compose your frustration, roll over and try to catch  8 blissfully boring hours of beauty sleep.

Why is it that we are never satisfied?Is it because we have been brought up to have a preconception of our  life from a young age? We are taught to map out our entire existence from day dot ,through magazines, films and music. Shaping how we should act and react.  Some people fantasise about making and keeping a home: 2 point 4 children, a doting husband, a house with a white picket fence and perma-smiles. Others fascinate about money and others constantly day dream about escaping.

I personally have encountered many of thoughts, however they are usually centred around sex, money and maybe the chance of love someday. I can only conclude that...


Rule number 3: Greed is good. Without it we would never strive for perfection. However daunting and sometimes painful it may be we should never feel as if we need or should settle for second best.

Money , boyfriends, acquaintances will come and go. But our mentality to attain our goals should always remain. What you do with it however, is up to you....

Therefore i am right to say that one day, John Kortajarena, you will be mine!


Yuppie
xx

A day to remember?

Have you ever wondered where Valentine’s Day originated?  Was it an Ancient Grecian day of expression, celebrating Aphrodite's antics? Or a Victorian ritual where dukes would woo their brides to be, setting aside a day each year to be valiant and 'take their hand in marriage'?

Realistically, each year valentines reminds those of us who are in a relationship that our situation is not always 'perfect'. That  being cooped up in a chicken pen of a restaurant, with the layout resembling a cramped school dinner hall is actually not our idea of fun!That the man on the table opposite obviously loves their girlfriend more, symbolised by her larger bouquet of red roses making our boyfriends feel and seem incompetent in some way.

When did we start idolising Valentines day as the holy grail and chose to forget our basic instinct.  A topic which vividly plays and replays through  my mind on a hourly basis.....SEX?! Each day we are visually targeted by  enticing imagery objectifying sex and empowering our animal instinct. Interpreted as , "Everyone is doing it".. so why cant we?

A day of promiscuity. One day a year that everybody can truly be deviant, dismiss inhibitions and fulfil every sexual desire that has been deeply embedded, quietly tucked away from public view. Conjugate fantasy with reality- His taste. His touch. His scent. Her taste, her touch , her scent.

Throughout history there has been an abundance of savvy women who have been branded distasteful.. but the thought of being a whore for a day has never been so alluring...

Rule number 2: Silence is Golden. Need i say more?

 So ladies, don’t despair.  Here's a little something to keep your mind wondering...

Shhhhhhhhh.... I wont tell if you don't

x

Let the games commence..

2011 and Yuppie gets lucky. Last night, as if from a dream a tall, handsome Spartan looking gentleman caught my eye. After countless swapped gazes, and intriguing stares i decided to take my fate into my own hands. Armed with Dutch courage I went to investigate.

Lawyer you say? Late 20's you say?No Girlfriend?  Fantastic, that is all the statistics I needed. Given that so much time is usually wasted when first meeting a future fling, as they feel as if they need to idly talk about their prospects and ambitions to keep you interested. I have decided to make some rules up of my own. So that every woman gets what they want, when they want. I call it trimming the fat: 

Rule number 1: Trimming the fat- skim read what they are telling you, get the main statistics and move on to having fun! 

After following my own mantra, i went in for the kill. A kiss, tracing his lips with my tongue, caressing his biceps and feeling his rock hard chest press against mine.His lips, soft, sucking on my ear and neck..


Needless to say i was hooked!

But it would be wrong to kiss and tell all at once.... till the next installment .

Yuppie xx

A Letter to Santa

Given that Christmas is just around the corner, i feel that it is only fair to use this festive season to my advantage! What does christmas bring? Not only mince pies, but the ability to write a wish list the size of a shoe closet without being branded a greedy brat. Therefore, to start my search for a man ( my human radiator for the winter), why not ask for help from the most charismatic and conscientious gentleman around?

So, armed with a large glass of wine, a scruffy notebook and a chewed up pen, i started to write..

Dear Santa,

I know you will get many of these letters but hopefully mine will stand out. Not just the spelling mistakes i may be making due to being under the influence, but the heart felt words i am scribing on this page. Seen as i have been a very good girl this year i want to ask you for a favour.

BRING ME A MAN! I know this is a vague description but i am actually quite fussy. I want all the cliches; Tall, dark, public school  hair, a sculpted body , arms that cradle his  t- shirt  and a large enough 'friend' to make my legs give way every time we fuck,  are intimate! Someone with a high enough sex drive to make me feel pretty on a regular basis , but a 'sensitive'side too. This could be him giving to charity? Or loving cute animals/ babies? I am not to bothered about this bit.However, I do not like criers, so no Matthew Mcconaughey!

Also, is it too much to ask for someone who is rich?I know all of these 'qualities' are usually sporadically dispersed between the male species, so i am willing to settle for a couple to make up for it. Ive enclosed some pictures just in case you need visual aid. 

Please can the well endowed one come first? I know ill have to wait my turn, cant say i am not used to it!

Thanks

Yuppie

I told you we could be greedy! Now, lets see if my wish list materializes over Christmas. If not, i always have copious amounts of alcohol to coax unsuspecting males and mistletoe packed in my purse...

Simplicity......

I like to work on a formula basis, and seen as algebra was always a subject close to my heart I can see the inherent link. A wise person once told me that "It's a numbers game honey", therefore I decided to apply that philosophy to everything I do in life.

So last night seemed simple, walk into the bar with your killer heels and figure hugging dress, with a men to women ratio of  3: 1 surely the end of the night would reap rewards?  How deluded could one be? 

Its like a scene from safari, men huddled together doting on the pack leaders every move. Laughing like school girls and only breaking the circle from more beer. Men look over and stare, wandering hands around the room sleazily  find your buttocks, one man even winked. You anticipate their approach..... it never happens. At what point in the 21st Century did men lose all of their traditional 'courting' confidence? Instead of introducing themselves, they stay in their little hunting packs too scared to venture out and find themselves a mate on their own! How do we expect to carry on the 'circle of life' when we can’t even talk to one another?

When the philosophy is applied to this situation, it makes total sense. Its not a numbers game anymore for men, it’s a safety in numbers! The fear of rejection gives them palpitations, a stronger emotion than the need for affection.

...By the end of the night, your ass feels like a tenderised steak and  the only person looking longingly into your eyes is the bar man...because he wants a tip!

Given my experiences tonight there is only one thing for me to do, if I ever want to be kissed underneath some mistletoe this Christmas, I cannot rely on the men to make the initial move!

Shame really, I'm rather lazy.........

A new start......

I have been told on numerous occasions I'm impressionable. I am moulded by media , and heavily influenced by the 'norms' it portrays to me. Its kind of like my bible... it answers all the niggling questions i may have about fashion, lifestyle, how to act in awkward situations, how to tell my boss 'i hate you', whilst looking fabulous at the same time. Like i said, its a bible of wealth not to be taken lightly. So when it opened my eyes to the Yuppie lifestyle i was instantly intrigued.

The best definition of Yuppie i came across: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=yuppie

This summed up what lifestyle i wanted to have, i wanted to set myself apart, i wanted to be different. This called for action!! Why not move to the city? Cocktails, clothes, men....oh my! In the city you can become whoever you desire, you can melt into the grey midst or you can shine with your own stripes!

Everyone will remember the famous scenes from such great epics such as Gossip Girl, and Sex and the City. The well know formula of girl meets city, girl meets boy and girl falls in love! Simple..... ?!? some may say programmes like this tarnish your perceptions of real life, and i can safely say my relationship ideals are truly infant in their nature...

So,  i want to put this to the test... Can women and men alike live by this simple formula? Find love, and run off into the sunset linked arms, through daisy fields, ending up happily ever after?There's only one way to find out. Get ready city... I hope your ready for me...